Read:
Left <------Right
01
- Should've made panel 1 and 2 into one panel showing a wider establishing shot of the room.
02
- My biggest mistake: I geared this too much towards my UCSC peers. Who else but those living in Dorms would understand removing the card from the door meant you were allowing it to lock ?
-Really should've put in that establishing shot I mentioned. Did you understand that Dante was sitting at the his build in Bar [something definitely not permitted in real life of course]?
03
- A wider view of the room in Panel 2 would've made the sequence a bit better.
-I still think the middle shot established their positions well, but, not everyone may recognized from where the camera is [the doorway].
- I just realized, I also geared this too much towards video gamers. But that was the point of the project. So never mind.
04
- Again, establishing shot on the first page: it would've made the first panel more understandable i think.
- Maybe Id's hand on Dante's should should've been more obvious. Probably just looks like a blob. Or at least made a better gateway to his fourth panel shot.
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09
-Dante's hands look terrible in the first panel. Not horrible, but definitely terrible.
10
blue pencil | pencil | photoshop cs
Project: Bideo, my last undergrad project (2006) - taking video game characters into real life situations [Video Game University, etc.]
Pages: 10/10
Languages: English, Japanese
Artist|Author|Translator: Jainai Jeffries
Rights: Characters belong to their given companies, story and artwork belong to myself.
Characters: Dante [Devil May Cry 3], Sephiroth [FF7], Id [xenogears], Auron[ff10], Lulu[ff10], Ivy[Soul Calibur], Dan[StreetFighter] - Cloud[ff7] Back of the head only.
-Following each post is my own post-commentary; faults I've found on my own.
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